Growing up, your man may have never witnessed an adult who could regulate their emotions. I hear this more often than not from the men I’ve coached. Maybe they saw yelling, maybe the silent treatment, and maybe even complete avoidance.
What happens is we learn the way to deal with uncomfortable emotions is to well, not deal with them.
Often, if this is the childhood experience the man in your life has had, he will view small situations as a crisis and complete chaos. He may have saw shame stop him from speaking up about the realities going on around him, and never feeling like he could trust that his emotions were safe.
He might have learned that what people thought and that the intellect was more important than how he felt.
If so, then He learned codependency, enabling, and overachieving, and overprotecting was love.
There comes a time when he will want to try a different way of living for himself and the family he’s creating. But he won’t know...
We have a sense deep inside that we are capable of more. It can feel exciting and overwhelming. And the truth is, we will never in this lifetime reach our full capacity. So there’s always a gap between our current abilities, or where we see room for improvement, there will always be a gap.
So how do we bridge that gap in a way that feels fun instead of futile, like you’re endlessly chasing a moving target?
We will only know how by choosing to take the next step we see in front of us, by choosing to engage, trying new things and setting bigger goals and believing that growth can be fun.
So you may not even know what I’m talking about with personal growth actually being fun, if you’re anything like I was, I want to say, back in my twenties. I remember being in the thick of my music degree, there was a semester when my music scholarship was hanging by a thread, and I was NOT enjoying my growth goals. All I could see in front of me was the gap. And I...
Do you consider yourself someone who knows how to receive answers to your prayers? And to take it a step further, do you want to teach your children how to build confidence in their ability to pray? Then this post is for you. . .
I’ve been teaching my 19 year old son who is on a mission and experienced a lot of illness. My daughter who is away at college in a very competitive music Arts program. And my youngest son who is figuring out how to plan his future, he’s a junior in high school and he has a difficult health diagnosis.
And I’m serious here. I want my kids to know how to pray in a way that accesses the powers of heaven. I believe the powers of heaven are real, and that we’ve been given everything we need to access those powers, if we have the faith to do so.
I also believe that God is bound to answer a prayer of faith, that God operates through spiritual laws that are scientific principles that govern the...
I want to speak to the power of having gratitude for good Mentors in your life. The impact of a good mentor can be a real game-changer for the trajectory of the path you take.
Today, I’m going to speak to five lessons I learned from five mentors who’ve given me some amazing gifts. I’m hoping that these gifts, these lessons, will inspire you to identify your mentors, and to think of ways you too can be a mentor for the people in your life. Also, to keep looking and learning from new mentors along the way. We are never too old for learning from people.
This lesson came from my grandmother. We were really close growing up. She had a gift for always seeing the good in people, and I have her to thank for seeing the good in me – even when I made mistakes – and I made some pretty big ones while growing up. Even through the mistakes, she loved me the best anyway....
Self-awareness if the foundation of a solid mental health strategy. Taking care of your brain. Your mental health really matters. So taking care of your brain is so important. When I think of the opposite of mental health, it’s mental illness. Mental health can affect every part of a persons life and the lives of those around them. Mental health can get in the way of peoples abilities to connect with other people. Most of us go through life unaware of how to heal those parts of us that need some care and loving attention. I’m here to help you heal yourself. I’ve devoted most of my own adult life to my own healing journey and I love sharing what I’ve learned.
It’s fall of 2020 and we are still dealing with the Covid-19 pandemic. I’m seeing a lot of anxiety. I’m seeing a...
When I hear the word bias, I think of either news organizations that slant their coverage to favor one political position over another or racial prejudice.
I learned about cognitive bias in my psychology courses in college —the collection of faulty ways of thinking that is apparently hardwired into the human brain. The collection is large. Wikipedia’s “List of cognitive biases” contains 185 entries, that is a significant amount!
Some of the biases are not a big deal at all, like the Ikea effect, for instance, which is defined as “the tendency for people to place a disproportionately high value on objects that they partially assembled themselves.” I know this one all too well.
But If I had to single out a particular bias as the most pervasive and damaging, it would probably be confirmation bias. That’s the effect that leads us to look for evidence confirming what we already think or suspect, to view facts...
In this mini course, I'll take you through the Emotion Coaching framework that is a gamechanger for cultivating more peace. Plus you'll discover how to shift the 'frustration habit' and parent from a place of trusting yourself more.
In this free mini course, I'll take you through the Emotion Coaching framework I've taught hundreds of moms and dads for cultivating more peace. Plus you'll discover how to shift the 'frustration habit' and parent from a place of trusting yourself more.